Ok guys what have you got?? Put all the jokes here let have some laughs…
Chheerrss, T2
Be Happy Go Fisshing
Wooii tak ada modal ke lu orang…cepat la posting itu jokes semua..
Chheerrss, T2
Be Happy Go Fisshing
ada ada…
One day one sweet Minah make a speech and says “i look stupid if i speaks in Malay…”
Pushing the angling limits!
Ikan kita adalah warisan yang tak ternilai. Puliharalah ia demi generasi akan datang.
Member of Kangkang? Kangkung? Kongkang?
Yehaaa!!!</font id=“blue”> [:D]
ok hahahahahaahh boleh dapat 1 LC lure dari LKG jangan lupa ambik bila jumpa nanti hehehehe, courtesy of t2my.
Chheerrss, T2
Be Happy Go Fisshing
got this from a friend of mine
Suami bin Lelaki
17, Jalan Angkasa,
24300, Kemaman
Terengganu.
Isteri binti Perempuan
17, Jalan Angkasa,
24300, Kemaman
Terengganu.
31 April 2006
Puan,
PERKARA : PERMOHONAN UNTUK BERPOLIGAMI
Perkara di atas adalah di rujuk.
2. Sebab utama permohonan ini di lakukan adalah kerana saya ingin
melengkapkan kuota yang telah di peruntukkan bagi saya. Buat masa ini
kuota yang telah di isi cuma satu, memandangkan masih ada 3 kekosongan, eloklah jika dapat di penuhi secepat mungkin. Pihak yang akan mengisi satu kekosongan ini buat masa ini ialah Cik Hana Fazura binti Ramli yang merupakan setiausaha saya di pejabat. Memandangkan komitmen yang beliau tunjukkan di pejabat amat baik, eloklah jika kita masukkan dia bersama kita di dalam organisasi keluarga kita. Kekosongan yang selebihnya akan di isi di masa akan datang.
3. Untuk makluman pihak puan, yang sebenarnya masalah ini telah lama sayafikirkan tetapi memandangkan poket saya yang selalu nipis, terpaksalah saya tangguhkan dulu permohonan ini di samping kurangnye rasa keyakinan untuk mengemukakan permohonan ini. Kini, setelah saya dapat mengeluarkan kesemua duit pelaburan ASB saya, saya merasakan kembalinya semangat saya yang telah hilang selama ini.
-
Permohonan ini amat setimpal kerana dengan kedudukan sekarang ia
menguntungkan kedua belah pihak dan juga pihak ketiga. Selama ini hidup kita bahagia sebab jika tidak, manakan mungkin puan dapat menjadi seperti sekarang. Semua yang puan miliki sudah bertambah besar. Kereta besar, rumah besar, rantai besar dan pakaian besar. Jika dulu potongan puan seperti gitar, kini sudah bertukar menjadi drum. Oleh itu, sudilah kiranya dapat kita kongsi bersama insan lain kebahagiaan kita ini. -
Pihak puan juga dapat menikmati faedah dari kelulusan permohonan ini kerana puan akan tetap menikmati apa yang telah puan miliki sekarang dengan waktu bekerja lebih singkat dan sistem syif akan di perkenalkan iaitu 1 hari kerja dan 1 hari cuti rehat. Waktu bekerja yang selebihnya akan ditampung oleh pihak ketiga. Kebaikan yang puan akan nikmati ialah waktu rehat yang bebas kerana dalam waktu puan bercuti, saya selaku Penyelia tidak akan memantau aktiviti yang puan lakukan. Pada waktu itu saya cuma akan fokus kepada hasil kerja pihak ketiga. Menguntungkan bukan?
-
Segala kerjasama dari pihak puan saya dahulukan dengan ribuan terima kasih. Saya amat berharap pihak puan dapat meluluskan permohonan saya ini kerana adalah lebih baik jika kita dapat berkongsi kebahagiaan kita ini bersama insan lain. Saya harap permohonan saya ini di balas dengan senyuman penuh keikhlasan dari pihak puan dan tandatangan puan di atas kertas yang saya lampirkan bukannya balingan periuk nasi, pinggan-mangkuk, ketukan
senduk dan perkara-perkara yang menyukarkan pihak puan untuk melakukannya. -
Saya harap puan sudi meluluskan permohonan ini. Hadirkanlah senyumanmu sebagaimana ketika kita menyambut orang baru iaitu bayi kita kedalam keluarga kita 10 tahun lepas. Situasinya lebih kurang sama dengan masa kini. Kita akan menerima orang baru juga cuma bezanya ialah jika 10 tahun yang lepas kita perlu menjaga dan membelainya dengan manja bersama tetapi kali ini, setiap urusan penjagaan dan belaian manja akan di laksanakan oleh saya sepenuhnya.
-
Akhir kata, saya harap permohonan saya ini dapat dibalas secepat
mungkin. Semoga kita bersama-bersama dengan pihak ketiga akan dapat
melaksanakan program ini dengan jayanya.
Sekian, Terima Kasih.
“BERKORBAN DAN BERKONGSI KEBAHAGIAAN LAMBANG RUMAHTANGGA BAHAGIA”
Yang Ikhlas Memohon,
Suami bin Lelaki
Nota :
En Suami bin Lelaki telah menarik kembali permohonan ini setelah Puan
Isteri binti Perempuan bertanyakan "Nak suruh saya tandatangan dimana?
Gunapisau boleh bang..?".
Kini anda berpeluang untuk hantarkan surat yang sedia didraf ini kepadaisteri anda pula. Caranya, cuma tukarkan nama dan alamat pengirim dan
penerima. Kalau anda berani cubalah… ahaks!
edit sikit.. panjang sgt
mbax
http://longkanggang.blogspot.com/
cheers
life is short [8)]…go fishing while u can..[:D]..
A young couple were driving down the road one day, happily, deliriously in love and due to be married the next day.
Suddenly, a large truck swerved from the oncoming lanes into their car! BOOM! And they both died.
At the Pearly Gates, the young couple confronted St.Peter. “Sir, you have to help us! We were to be married tomorrow. Is there any way we can be married in Heaven?”
“Hmmm,” replied St. Peter, “I don’t recall there ever being a marriage in Heaven. Well, let’s take it up with God and see what he says.”
So they approached God with their plea. God sat for a moment, pondering the request.
Then he looked down and said, “Come back in five years and ask me again.”
Five years later, the couple approached God again, even more in love than ever and pleading that he allow their marriage.
God paused for quite a while, musing over their request. Then he spoke, “Come back in five years and ask me again.”
And once again, five years later, the couple was again in the presence of God, more in love than ever and begging God’s permission for the third time to marry.
This time God smiled broadly and thundered, “Yes my children, you may marry!”
Well, the wedding went off beautifully, the reception was huge, everyone thought the bride was simply…breathtaking and the groom was soooo…handsome, and everyone was happy! Until…
Two years later, the couple was back before God, and things were not looking so good.
The couple had come to the realization almost immediately that although marriages were made in heaven, they didn’t last very long there!
And, in spite of their struggles to come to terms with the situation, they had decided there simply was no alternative but to get a divorce.
Black clouds fractured by lightening rolled across the sky, and the ground shook with explosive thunder.
God glared down at the tiny couple before him, his face becoming dark and angry, and he roared, “Divorce?! Impossible!!!It took us TEN years just to find a priest in Heaven! Do you have any idea how long it will take to find a LAWYER?!!”
luckily we don’t have any lawyer here in LKG… [:P]
I come, I see, I fish!
WL
(Team Longkang Gang Kelisa U4 2006)
http://longkanggang.blogspot.com/
ada ada
loyer buruk… hahahaha… ramai pulak tu..
Pushing the angling limits!
Ikan kita adalah warisan yang tak ternilai. Puliharalah ia demi generasi akan datang.
Member of Kangkang? Kangkung? Kongkang?
Yehaaa!!!</font id=“blue”> [:D]
An Indian moves to Montrealand goes to a big department store looking for a job.
The manager asks, “Do you have any sales experience?”
The Indian says, “Yeah, I was a salesman back home”.
Well, the manager liked the young man, so he gave him the job. “You start tomorrow. I’ll come down after we close and see how you did, but let me give you a bit of advice. If a customer comes looking, say, for toothpaste, you might suggest for him a toothbrush, or shaving cream etc. You get the idea?”
“Of course,” the young man said. His first day on the job was rough but he got through it.
After the store was locked up, the manager came down. "How many sales did you make today?
The Indian says, “One”
The manager groans, "Just one? Our sales people average 20 or 30 sales/day.
How much was the sale for?"
The Indian says, “$101,237.64.”
The manager exclaims, “What? $101,237.64? What did you sell him?”
The Indian replied, “First I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a larger fishhook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing, and he said down at the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department, and I sold him that twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said he didn’t think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4X4 Pajero.”
The manager says “You mean a guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and truck?!”
The Indian says, "No, no, no, he came in here to buy a box of Kotex for his wife and I said, “Well, since your weekend’s already screwed up you might as well go fishing.”
So this weeekend…mana mau pigi[:D]
http://longkanggang.blogspot.com/</font id=“size1”>
An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship holding her hat on tight so that it would not blow off in the wind.
A gentleman approached her and said: “Pardon me, madam. I do not intend to be forward, but did you know that your dress is blowing up in this high wind?”
“Yes, I know,” said the lady, “I need both hands to hold onto this hat.”
“But, madam, you must know that you are not wearing a panty and your privates are exposed!” said the gentleman in earnest.
The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, "Sir, anything you see down there is 75 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday
http://longkanggang.blogspot.com/</font id=“size1”>
T2 bro,
Mr. Mango jatuh from mango tree can consider as one not???
Jeymatt bro,
Sorry-uh, the reward of 1 LC lure is just too hard to resist…
If the joke is on me, then I should get 2 LC lures coz I supply laughters to LKG hahahah.</font id=“black”>
"Angling may be said to be so like cooking that it can never be fully learned "
http://longkanggang.blogspot.com/
Waahh banyak ada, LC lure sure laku punya…heheheheh
Chheerrss, T2
Be Happy Go Fisshing
A very rich man is quite fed up with his 30yrs old useless son,so he gave him an ultimatum…1 year to come up with a viable business proposal OR he will cut him from his will…As usual his useless son insisted on travelling the globe to scout for a viable business …Days went by…weeks come and gone…months skip by and NOTHING!! you see this useless son was having the time of his life paint every towns red… Finally the END is just round the corner and THIS USELESS son became FRANTIC…One more day left and he WAS REALLY DESPERATE!!! As he was walking he saw a man making sausages..it looks simple… put meat in one end and viola sausages out the other end… He started thinking BIG (a strained on his hardly used brain) .Instead of putting chunk of meat in i make a bigger machine where i can shaft a WHOLE PIG in and MORE sausages will come out from the other end??? sound very impressive!!! He quickly call his dad, “dad! i 've found a machine where you push a pig in one end and sausages comes out the other end!!! and somemore dad,it has never been done before!!!” A BOOMING VOICE ROAR FROM THE OTHER END “SON!!! YOU USELESS NINCOOMPOOP !!IS THIS ALL YOU CAN COME UP WITH AFTER 1 YEAR AND SPENDING THOUSAND OF MY HARD EARN MONEY??? YOU IDIOT, 30 YEARS AGO I ALREADY USE SUCH A MACHINE BUT IT WORKS THE OPPOSITE WAY!!! YOU SEE 30 YEARS AGO I SHAFT MY SAUSAGE IN AND A PIG LIKE YOU CAME OUT THE OTHER END!!!” Needless to say he lost all his inheritance…
So T2, got LC or not???
for dato’ lanc sure got 2 LC lures…heheheheheheh
Chheerrss, T2
Be Happy Go Fisshing
There was 3 monks on their yearly prigrimage to a distance holy place.They belong to a sect where they MUST NOT GET THEIR PRIVATE ORGAN WET.In their yearly journey,they must cross a bridge.This year the bridge was wash away by a very big flood.WHAT TO DO? one of them cry out.They sat down and begins to think…after several hours one of them exclaimed in a very excited tone…“I got it!!! you see it is so simple!!! what we should do in order not to wet our KUKUKUS is this i bend over and you stick your kukudus in my are and you bend over and the third one will stick his in your are and we can safely cross the river without wetting our kukukus” So with this ingenious plan they managed to cross the river without wettin their kukudus…
hahahaha… dato, that’s a good one [}:)]… if u know what i mean
I come, I see, I fish!
WL
(Team Longkang Gang Kelisa U4 2006)
http://longkanggang.blogspot.com/
“Perempuan jangan menyanyi masa di dapur, nanti kahwin lelaki tua”
That’s what happen to Siti Nurhaliza.
http://longkanggang.blogspot.com/]
“If a fish ain’t bitting your hook, then hook yourself with something else!”
</font id=“blue”>A SAD CASE LAH THIS SITI THING…A SWEET YOUNG THING MARRYING A OLDMAN… INSTEAD OF GETTING SWEET DATES SHE IS GETTING DRIED PRUNES…
A SAD CASE LAH THIS SITI THING…A SWEET YOUNG THING MARRYING A OLDMAN… INSTEAD OF GETTING SWEET DATES SHE IS GETTING DRIED PRUNES…